*The Pointless Writer*
has a life you're completely uninterested in. But it's okay because I can write. No abbreviations. No shoddy grammar (though I'm not immune to mistakes). Just quality writing on sometimes completely pointless topics.
UnPoints of Note
1. I write when fancy takes. Sometimes, fancy takes many months of leave.
A Lesson in Confidence
Confidence. Forever elusive. Just when you think you have it, you learn it is a mirage and naught but an illusion. I was pretty sure I had it pat down earlier this year. Now I learn otherwise.
Confidence can be an act. Mine certainly was.
Confidence can be specific. For instance, I'm a socially unconfident person, but in my forte--singing--I reek of confidence. To the extent that some may mistake it as arrogance. I try to prove them wrong.
Confidence can be contagious. And that's the lesson I shall elaborate on today.
Remember the two-part mini series I wrote some time back on my singing exam? Remember how sure I was that I screwed it up? That was my first taste of lacking confidence in what has been my forte for a few years. Well, for the record, I got a Distinction. 145 marks out of 150. I scored full marks for my first three (accompanied by piano) pieces. All my marks were lost once my anxiety and nervousness set in. I was shocked. I was amazed. I was overjoyed. My mother? Of course she congratulated me, but at the same time, she was no where near surprised. She had enough confidence in me that she believed I would attain my Distinction despite all my fears.
Yong Siew Toh Conservatory of Music, NUS, will be allowing students to major in Voice as an instrument from next year onwards. It is a dream come true. I'm eligible for application despite not taking Music 'O' Levels and 'A' Levels. It doesn't matter that I'm still doing Theory Grade 6 ABRSM, effectively rendering me STILL ineligible to take H2 Music in our school. It is the chance of a lifetime. I have spent time regretting past choices I made that have turned me into a late starter and destroyed my chances at pursuing classical music as a career. Taking Grade 5 at 17 years of age is VERY unimpressive. Still, there is a window of opportunity for me to now pursue my first love, never mind the mistakes I've made.
Since the selection is based mainly on the audition, my mother is convinced I'll get in. She doesn't say, "If you get into Yong Siew Toh" as I think to myself. She says, "WHEN you are in Yong Siew Toh..." THAT's how confident she is in me. Shall I adopt her confidence and make it my own? Shall I allow it to INFECT me?
Yes. I shall.